Noah and the ravens (the Norse story that never was)

Just a little story that wanted to exist somewhere outside my mind today … I hope you’ll enjoy!

Long ago, as Odin sat upon his high seat and surveyed the world, he grew concerned by growing signs and portents of an unprecedented flood far toward the south. Wishing to know more, his curiosity drawn most keenly by what looked like a mighty boat being built, and rumors of giants in the southern lands, he dispatched his faithful, ever-watchful ravens – Huginn (which means, “thought” in the Old Tongue) and Muninn (which means, “memory”)- to take a closer look. With very little effort, the raven pair found themselves a place aboard the colossal boat with every animal imaginable ….

Roughly 200 days into the voyage, with still no giants in sight:
Huginn: Hey, Muninn, I was thinking …
Muninn: ?
Huginn: We’ve been on this boat for a long time. The windows have been shut day and night, and it seems like everyone’s a vegetarian. The only thing they do here – and they seem to do it a lot – is go on about how thankful they are to the god who’s responsible for this vapid voyage. 
Muninn: ??
Huginn: Well, look: they are all off to pray again! What would you say to you and me hopping up on that beam over there and having a little fun together?
Muninn: You do remember what happened the last time we did that?
Huginn: I’d almost forgotten! Of course I do … but this time, they’re all off praying, and it’s not as though they’d be watching, not like they were all the times before ….
Muninn (after only a moment’s pause for consideration): Hmmmmm … okay!

Several minutes later, having been caught, in flagrante delicto, by no less than Noah, his wife, and a pair of very astonished rabbits, Huginn and Muninn were roundly scolded by Noah. Huginn, resenting the interruption and not at all enjoying the idle cursing from Noah, offered up what he thought was a suitable representation of his feelings on the matter. Huginn then tried, in vain, to ease the tension of the situation with a bit of humor; but it seems Noah was not really a raven person, or at least didn’t understand the subtleties of raven humor. Concerned at the not-vehement-enough refutations Noah made to some of Huginn’s more lewd accusations, Noah’s wife casually caused a nearby shuttered window to fly open, thus opening the way for the ravens to depart the vessel ….

Noah (shouting and waving his fists from an ever-increasing distance): You two ravens had better come back here this instant – I’m not through with you yet!

Huginn: By Thor’s bristling beard! I was starting to think we’d never get off that boat! What ever were we thinking, getting on there in the first place?
Muninn: Erm, All-father thought, we obeyed ….
Huginn: Oh, right. Well, now we’re free, the water seems to have gone away, and – oh, HEY! Look at all those dead bodies lying around on the ground! I mean, Noah and his god aren’t much for exciting sojourns at sea: but just look at the after-voyage feast!
Muninn: Huginn, don’t you think we should get back to Asgard and deliver our report to Odin?
Huginn: What’s the hurry? Odin told us to get on that boring boat in the first place, and we’ve been there for months! Surely Odin wouldn’t mind us composing ourselves a little before we get under way … I for one report much more clearly with a full stomach! And look, there: a rainbow! So the gods are on their way down here anyway … I’ll bet that eyeball over there that the first god down here will be Loki! And when HE sees that giant boat, stuck up in that mountain, with all those people and animals who haven’t even allowed themselves life’s most basic pleasures for – how long has it been now? – oh, it would almost be worth it to fly back, just to see what fun Loki has with them!
Muninn (grinning in a raven-like way): But only almost!
Huginn: So what do you say? Let’s perch somewhere and compensate for months of eating a horse’s diet! We can fly back to Asgard afterward – and then of course there’s always time for a little more fun of our own ….
Muninn: Rogue! And, with such a limited range of thinking, Odin relies on you for your thoughts!
Huginn (with a wink): Yeah, but I’m the one who gives you your happiest memories!

And then Muninn blushed, and Odin had to wait a little longer for news from the South ….

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